Why does my chicken pot pie taste like toothpaste =(
And WHY do I continue to EAT IT?!

The meaning of life? It's a trick question. Life doesn't exist in the first place.
Oh ho ho! I'm so clever! People invented "meaning" - and existence, far above and below our level of consciousness, has no reason to adhere to it.

Other things people invent and seem to base the universe on are definitions and categories. There is NO clear cut line saying this is that and that is thus this. It's all just a jumbled mesh of existence - We're not on "earth", we're not "humans" and we're not "alive". We're just the universe.

Got it? Hope so... Nobody seems to believe me.

Greg Cole is my mortal enemy. He will rue the day he crossed my path.

Apparently changes in the course syllabus are my responsibility, including when on the 14th he goes and changes the exam from the 24th to the 16th. I now have one day to study when I would have had more than enough time. Not only that, I have to cancel/reorganize prior appointments to fit around this.

This guy just needs to get his shit together. A while ago I read for 2 hours before realizing it was the wrong part of the book due to a typo. Then there are the times he tells us to read a chapter, then gives us page numbers that include two other chapters and exclude the one he told us to read. Then there are the times he tests us on things that aren't anywhere in the book or online notes. Or the times we lose points because he doesn't know how to spell the names of famous psychologists. Or howabout when we lose points for including peoples middle names when identifying them.

Seriously. I do not like this guy. I wish I could say something angry without it being construed as a threat.

My God. Sonic Unleashed. I want it.

That's enough FFXI for me. It's... Pretty bad.
So I got WoW. Goodbye GPA :D
I'm level 16 after two days I think. I made an Orc hunter and Matt made one too so we've been leveling and stuff, and he gave me 100 gold which is pretty damn awesome for a new character.

ANYWAY. I'm off to play some more!

Well I finally got a credit card which means I finally got a Final Fantasy XI account. That game is incredibly difficult to get into - Mainly because it's so different from WoW that I just don't know what I'm doing and it's impossible to figure out when nobody will help me. ;_; As of now I'm a level 4 Elvaan Black Mage. Impressive, huh? I can cast like. Two spells. And sometimes I can kill rabbits. Sometimes.

I also managed to mod my PSP... I had to slash the EEP ground connection in my battery so I could put the PSP into service mode and install otherwise unusable software. Luckily I had an extra battery. I had to downgrade the firmware (Like an operating system) which is apparently potentially fatal to PSPs but I didn't know this until afterward. After that it's just a matter of installing a hacked version of the official firmware. Now I can just download games and stick them on my memory card instead of paying piles of money for them! Wee. The best part is being able to download games I couldn't even find at stores in the first place. I can also play PS1 games on there now, and have a pile of old emulators for NES, SNES, GBA, Genesis, etc...

That's my nerd rant.

6. Hours. Of. Homework.
I had to call in sick just to get it done.
HOLY SHIT. But it's almost done now. My head hurts...

9 times now Dr. Wily has made an army of robots in an attempt to conquer the world.

You'd think they'd stop letting him out of jail.

I'm on some fucking Mega Man spree it would seem. I downloaded 1-6 (NES), 7 (SNES), 8(PSX), 9-13(SNES) and 16 (PSX)... I'm having trouble finding 14 and 15, and I'm not sure I want 17 or 18 because they're just bad but I'll probably get them anyway.

Then I got Mega Man Zero 1-4 (GBA), ZX and ZX Advent... My god there are a lot of these.

Too fucking tired for a real post...

Isn't it time for the old gods to die?
To arms is the only cry.

I finally got a fancy new chair that doesn't hurt to sit in which means I can start using all the shit I've been downloading. (Heroes, arrested development, futurama...) My dad got me to move my computer downstairs which it turns out I like a lot more. I've got my own little hole to hide away in and I can listen to music without waking anyone up which is pretty sweet too. After moving my computer downstairs though it royally fucked up for no good reason. Turns out the power supply decided to die on me so I had to call matt and he brought me a spare one he had sitting around, among other things like a PCI TV tuner. Got the power supply switched out and it was still not working so after some random fucking around it was in decent enough shape... He leaves and then me fan monitor goes on me, starts saying OH NO not a single fan in the computer is running! I look in and they're all just fine. So I had to disable that. I think my computer is finally done bitching at me, just had to smack it into line.

Still waiting on student loan stuff... It had better come soon or I don't have any money ;D I've also gotta get driver's ed stuff worked out. I'm fucking NERVOUS for it and I have no idea why, I'm sure it'll be fine.

I'm sick of working this much. Every day I go to work and when I come home I only get a few hours to do what I need to do, but I guess this is the situation most people are in when they have a full time job, I'm just not used to it. Hopefully next summer I can get away with working a little less - This year though I had a few huge drains on money, like rent for the apartment I wasn't actually living in, then lots of random little things like replacing my water damaged cell phone. Now as soon as I'm done saving school money I've gotta get saving for my teeth... Insurance says teeth are entirely cosmetic (come on...) so I'm gonna have to come up with a good $2000! Lucky me. Happy fucking fun time.

I really don't have much to say. I'm tired. I'm hungry. I just wanted to try to make a habit of doing this so I'm not too lazy when I actually DO have something to say ;D

Christ! New Dragonforce and it's GREAT. This is a good day for humanity... You know what else is great? Watchmen. I don't know how they're going to make a movie out of it because it's just so STRANGE - it doesn't even follow a specific time flow... Nonetheless, the graphic novel is just wonderful so I advise you read it before IT READS YOU >:((((

God. New people at work are annoyingly slow. I realize I was once a new person - And not too long ago - But thank god I'm not anymore. And the people who aren't new are just stupid so all together nothing gets done nearly as efficiently as it could. Then there's Chris who thinks "LOL" stands for "Love of The Lord". Why does everyone have to suck? Why can't they all just be clones of me? Ah yes, because if they were they'd all kill each other to be the only one... There goes that idea.

Good lord this Dragonforce is giving me an erection. Metaphorically of course. So my Dad is randomly gone to the cottage and didn't even tell me - He says he did but who really knows. He's gone until Sunday though so now I am foodless once more. There was a potluck at work but I hate social situations so I didn't go. He's getting me to move my computer to the basement because he's a big noob but this means he'll be buying a wireless router which I'll be able to take advantage of. He also said he was gonna buy me a good computer chair, then changed his mind, but I might be able to guilt him into it still.

I ended up selling Halo and Lost Odyssey... I know Lost Odyssey wasn't too great and I don't even plan on getting a 360 to play Halo on but I feel like I lost the last part of my old life by getting rid of them. They were all I had to still remind me of the good days of drunken gaming with my friends at my own apartment... Now I'm temporarily living with my dad and brad doesn't even talk to me. Things with Shizzy are of course beyond destroyed so she doesn't talk to me, but that was to be expected. As much as some things sucked I can't help but miss them horribly. I only have two friends left and I'm getting really fucking lonely. I don't even talk to Azzy anymore. It seems all the mutual friends me and Shizzy had just kind of went with her and forgot about me.

Mood swings FTW.

So with the Halo/Lost Odyssey/other games money I got DBZ Shin Budokai: Another Road, Silent Hill Origins and Mega Man Powered Up. They're all great. Nothing beats big, flashy DBZ battles. Silent Hill is like the original which was my favorite one - fucking CREEPY instead of stupid. Mega Man is a remake of the first one but bright and cartoony and 2.5D with a level editor and a bunch of other good stuff. Story, voice acting, challenge mode, the ability to play as the bosses... It's pretty sweet for a Mega Man fan. Now I just need to mod my PSP and get a bunch of SNES roms on there. I still regret giving up my DS because I know it's just collecting dust when I could use it for Final Fantasy IV which I was waiting for forever. I think I even left my FF3 in there so I can't trade it in or anything and that's one game Shizzy will never even look at. She's got all my PS2 games too... DBZ, Shadow of the Colossus, FF12... I really wish I had them but I'm not sure I'm going to be seeing them again. I'll just have to stop being nice so this kind of thing doesn't happen I guess.

Holy shit I'm updating LJ. What's up with that?

Almost everyone gets glimpes of how the world around them is really working, and sometimes they start to understand their place in it... Even the high sometimes don't understand WHERE they stand and the lowest of the low seem to be the ones who see it all too well. I've only seen glimpes myself and it's enough to make me sick. The world is what we make of it and we make it into something so disgusting we can't bear to live in it anymore. Just look at the number of people who kill themselves when they see what's going on, what they perpetuate every fucking day by going out and getting a job at a place like Wal-Mart or buying a $1000 bottle of perfume. I don't claim to be above this, it's practically unavoidable. The problem is that the only people who want to do anything about it have the wrong ideas entirely.

You nuke communists (Not that I have anything against communism - The problem is that so many people do), you put down a rabid dog... What do you do when the world gets out of control? You burn it to the fucking ground. In the midst of this perpetual hate machine, this fucking disease ridden whorehouse of a society, the only thing that stands out is the people who know what to do and when we recognize them we destroy them because we naturally oppose their mislabeled magnificence.

What is this intrinsic deathwish we seem to share?

I'm at work and I think of so many things I could say here, and they'd be great to get down, but then I get home and I'm just like "LOLOL?!?!"... End.

New glasses, hopefully contacts actually, will allow me to see again. New teeth allow me to chew and then I'll be as good as new. It'll be nice to function again. I'm thinking though that I should have skipped the painkillers before work. Well, at least work will be entertaining...

Yeah I really don't have much else to say right now. Maybe later.

GOOD GOD I NEED TO GO TO SLEEP
This is the night of incessant updates.

Is it just me or does everyone think they're all fucking dark and poetic these days?

I just had to tell this one douchebag off who had me on his friends list for a good 2 years even though I never added him back because of his fucking DARK AND POETIC DOUCHEBAGGERY.

Now there are of course people who do a good job of it because they don't have to try but most people should just fuck off.

There is a glowing light you'll find
Hiding, elusive at first
And your mind - a festering fright behind
What was meant to be a thirst
But rest assured, my will came first

*delete delete delete delete*

am i the only one in the world who was fucking creeped out by majora's mask? the way the moon looks down at you grinning madly, getting closer and closer. how on the third night it's almost crashed and you can see how people deal with it - some watch from their roofs, knowing they're going to die, some hide in a bar getting drunk, and everyone knows the world's going to end in a matter of hours.

i mean, it's fucking creepy, it's THE most atmospheric zelda game and people say it's the worst console one.

that's all.

Forgive me father for I have sinned
I'm a child of the air, I'm a witch of the wind
And I'm still wide awake...

From the earth, up through the trees
I can hear her calling me
Her voice rides on the breeze
It's haunting me

Beware my friends, as you pass by
As you are now so once was I
As I am now so you must be
Prepare my friends to follow me

It hurts so bad I can't breathe
Prepare to follow me

~~~

Endless stairs, a guiding light
It seems to shine bright but it's cold
Wicked signs will mark our way

Call me Messiah, I am god
A true lord but alone
Call me a liar, I won't deny

I can't describe the pain I feel
Outside it's dark, inside it's cold
The sun still shines bright
But its time is short

Endless stairs, a guiding light
That once was warm
But now it's bitter cold
It's freezing hearts, it's freezing souls
It pretends to be alive